


Euphoria

by Bird (everyoneblooms)



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Drug Addiction, Drug Dealing, Drug Use, F/M, Implied Sexual Content, Poe Dameron Is A Mess, Young Poe Dameron, abandoned, alas, also mora is kind of a bitch sometimes, i suck at editing, idk how tagging works on ao3, poe and oc have history, spice runner poe, wanted to try fixing the spice running thing
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-31
Updated: 2020-04-20
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:22:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,075
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23403670
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/everyoneblooms/pseuds/Bird
Summary: Poe Dameron left his spice running life behind six years ago and hasn’t looked back. While on a mission on the rocky planet of Lusit he runs into a girl he used to know.
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Original Character(s), Poe Dameron/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story is filled with (fictional) drug use and addiction, as well as other mature themes. Due to that I recommend you don't read this fic if you're a minor or if this content may be triggering to you. By writing this I do not mean to glorify addiction.  
> Anyways!! Enjoy, I'm very excited to be writing this. Leave a comment and let me know what you think.

**_Present_ **

The mission is relatively simple; go to Lusit, a rocky planet on the Outer Rim, meet with the informant, and head back to base. If things went well they would be picking up the load of blasters and ammunition in 72 hours. Poe had high hopes, he was the best pilot in the resistance, after all- maybe even the galaxy. If anyone could pull off this mission it was him.

He’s made it to the inn already, the smell of brine is so heavy in the air he can taste it. Lusit isn’t a place many people visit, including the First Order. It makes it the prime spot for an incognito meetup. The only other people at the inn are a few vagabonds that are drunk already and some employees that he pays no mind. He’s considering going to get a drink when someone speaks up behind him. “Well, well, well, look what the loth-cat dragged in.” Poe is sure he recognizes the voice but he can’t place where. When he spins in his chair to look he becomes dizzy with the shock. It’s a girl- no, a woman, that he left behind years ago.

**_Past_ **

Poe and his lover are laid up in bed, both naked and taking turns sucking smoke from the pretty, glass pipe. Poe has decided that spice is one hell of a drug. How foolish he was before to be running it without ever trying it for himself. He’s glad Mora convinced him to give it a shot.

He’s so high that he’s seeing double, the weight of his lover’s head on his chest is unbearably sweet. If he just closed his eyes he could fall asleep right now. He brushes a hand through her hair, watching the way it shines in the late afternoon sun that shines in the window. He thinks if he stays here much longer he could fall in love with her. But staying long is never an option.

They fuck lazily and by the time they’re done Poe has sobered up enough to fly. “Send me a holo when you need me to take care of you again,” Poe tells her as he pulls his pants back up. He means with spice, but based on the sultry smile she gives him she has other ideas. She’s already sprawled out across the bed and smoking again. Poe desperately wants to stay, but he finds the willpower to leave. Like he always does.

**_Present_ **

“Kriff,” Poe breathes out. Six years later and she can still take his breath away just like that. She looks mostly the same, but her hair has changed and her face is more angular.  _ Kriff, she’s so skinny. When did she lose so much weight?  _ Despite the separation of so many years he’s worried about her.

He takes too long finding the words to say, so Mora beats him to it. “Fancy meeting you here, Dameron. Last I heard you’d run off to join the New Republic. I wouldn’t expect you to hang out with us lowlifes.” She’s mocking, but not necessarily aggressive.

“Kriff,” Poe repeats. “Mora, wow, what are you doing here?”

She holds up a rag, “What’s it look like? I work here.” As if to prove a point she leans forward and rubs at an invisible spot on the table. “See? Cleaning.” She looks up at him with that mischievous little smirk he used to know so well. “Anyways, can I get you a drink, Dameron?”

“A whiskey for me, get yourself whatever you like,” He hands over some coins and she smiles warmly at him and makes her way to the bar. He watches her, unable to stop himself from staring. She looks up from the drinks as she makes them and catches him, Poe doesn’t look away. She shakes her head and goes back to the drinks, but Poe can see her smiling a little.

She gives Poe his drink and goes to check on the other customers before she makes her way back to him. “How long have you been here?” He asks before she’s even sat all the way down.

“Two years,” she tells him. “It’s not glamorous but it’s honest work.”

Poe nods, “Good for you.”

She scoffs at him, “Oh, so you  _ are  _ better than us.”

Poe groans, rubbing a hand along his jaw, “Don’t start with this, Mora. I didn’t mean it like that.”

“Whatever you say, flyboy. My turn to ask a question. Are you still with the New Republic?” She’s scrutinizing him now, and though Poe is a confident person by nature he can’t help but feels insecure. Six years has aged him a lot, he feels. He’s already starting to get crow’s feet. 

Poe scans the inn to make sure nobody is listening in on them, but nobody appears to be. He lowers his voice anyways, just to be safe. “I’m with the Resistance now.”

“Rank?”

“Hey,” Poe argues, “it’s my turn to ask a question.” But, because he can’t help but gloat a little bit, “Commander.”

She gives a little laugh, “So prideful, Poe Dameron.”

He isn’t offended, he knows she always liked his pride. “I heard rumors you were staying in a Hutt palace for awhile.”   
“Not my proudest moment,” she admits, “I wasn’t a prostitute though, if that’s what you think. I danced, they gave me three meals and a roof over my head.”

“I would never judge you for that,” Poe tells her, his voice so low she can hardly hear it over the ambiance of the inn. Then, to break the tension, “Your turn.”

She leans back in her seat, taking him in once more. She lets her eyes linger on his chest, he has the top three buttons of his shirt undone. It’s humid on Lusit and his shirt is clinging to him, moisture droplets are collecting on his chest and neck. Poe starts to squirm a little bit under her eyes and she meets his eyes, smirking. “Do you have a girl back on base?”

“No,” his voice is impossibly husky now. “When do you get off?”

She glances at a clock over the bar. “Technically an hour ago, I just stuck around for something to do.”   
Poe tips his head back, swallowing the rest of his whiskey. Mora does the same with her drink. Poe stands and offers her his hand and leads her up the stairs and down the hall to his room. The second the door closes behind them they’re on each other. Their lips slot together easily and her hands immediately go to his hair, tugging in that way he always loved. Poe presses her to the wall, hoisting her leg up to rest on his hip. He notices that his hand almost wraps around her entire thigh, but he pushes the thought away.  _ For another time. _ Commenting on it now would only upset her and ruin this moment. So instead Poe lets himself get lost in the feel of her. He ruts against her, already wishing their clothes were out of the way. She makes him come undone in the most sinful of ways.

“Poe,” she gasps between kisses. She brings her hands down to his shoulders and pushes him away a little so she can get his lips off hers. “I have spice,” she offers, “do you want to smoke?”

“I don’t do that anymore,” Poe admits, she laughs and for some reason it makes him feel embarrassed.

“The Navy really did change you, Poe.” Then her hands roam from his broad shoulders to his biceps, obviously sizing him up. He’s put on a lot more muscle since they last saw each other. “I suppose it’s not all bad,” she hums thoughtfully.

Then they are kissing again as she pushes him back towards the bed. It hits the back of his knees and he falls back. Mora takes the opportunity to peel her shirt off and Poe feels his heart rate pick him. She’s still so beautiful,  _ but too thin _ . She’s all sharp edges, with jagged ribs and prominent hip bones. Poe leans up on his elbows, pressing a kiss to each individual rib as she hovers over him. Then she’s falling on top of him and all he knows is her. Her smell, her touch, her  _ everything _ is so overwhelming.


	2. Chapter 2

**Present**

The first thing Poe becomes aware of in the morning is the pins and needles sensation in his left arm. The second is the familiar weight of Mora curled up in his bed with him. His heart swells in his chest and he’s sure it’s about to burst out of his rib cage. It’s the first time he’s felt this in years, since before he joined the New Republic. He’s had the occasional hookup but none have ever stayed the night and none have ever made him feel so airy and happy.

He tips his head to look down at her. His arm is tucked under her slim body and her head is laid on his chest. One of her hands is splayed across his abdomen. He feels his heart rate spike as he looks at her bare breasts and the hickeys he sucked on them last night. When they were fucking it felt like nothing had changed, but now in the light of day Poe can’t deny that everything is different. 

Mora starts to stir, just little movements at first. Poe shimmies his arm out from under her. “Mornin,” he says in his throaty morning voice. Last night was like a fever dream, and now that he’s faced with it being reality he’s scared. The urge to just run away and never look back is strong, but some kind of strength he didn’t have when he was younger holds him in place.

The hand on his stomach glides up to his chest and Mora uses it as leverage so she can peer down into his face. She doesn’t say anything, just studies him with an unreadable expression on her face. Poe is struck again by just how beautiful she is. She’s aged as well, which makes him feel better about his crow’s feet and laugh lines.

“Come with me, Mora,” he says to her, his voice is hardly above a whisper and he doesn’t do a good job hiding the hope in it.. “The resistance is always looking for recruits. We need people to cook, people to sew, all kinds of stuff.”

Mora gives him the faintest of a weary smile as she stands up and begins to redress, much to Poe’s disappointment. “I don’t think your new friends would like me much, Poe. You may have shaped up but I’m the same person I always was. Anyways, who says I want to start a new life?”

“Come on,” Poe scoffs incredulously. “You’re gonna try and tell me you want to be on this salt pit of a planet.” Mora is stubborn, she always has been. It’s a trait Poe always admired, but it was also their downfall 6 years ago. He’s sure she’s only bluffing, she just needs a little prodding before she agrees to join him.

She opens her mouth to respond but three sharp knocks on the door stops her in her tracks. Her eyebrows furrow and she stares towards the door suspiciously. 

“Housekeeping,” someone calls in a cheerful voice.

Poe looks at Mora confused, “Do you guys have housekeeping here?” He keeps his voice low so the visitor can’t hear. It didn’t seem like that kind of place, what with the bullet holes in the walls and the bar full of smugglers.

She just shakes her head silently, her eyes wide as saucers. Poe takes his blaster from the bedside table and holds it ready at his side. “I didn’t order housekeeping,” he calls back experimentally. He creeps to the door and rests his hand on the knob.

“Open up please,” the voice respond, but this time it isn’t a suggestion, it’s a command. Mora eyes Poe wildly and he ushers her behind him silently. 

“Look what you got me into,” she hisses into the back of his neck. It makes his blood hot but he ignores it, he has more pressing matters to take care of. For example, the suspicious housekeeping right outside the door. He holds his hand out, halting any movements she was making. Then he slowly begins to twist the door knob while raising his blaster to what he hopes is chest height. He flings the door open aggressively, hoping to throw the intruder off guard. It works, Poe sees the flash of white armor and doesn’t hesitate to shoot. The second stormtrooper is still trying to register what happened when Poe puts a blast through his chest as well. He’s not foolish enough to think these troopers were alone and there’s commotion downstairs, the others have heard the gunshots and are barrelling up the stairs.

“Come on, I know another way out.” Mora grabs Poe’s hand and they run together, further down the hallway. There’s a smaller room at the end of the hall with a do not enter sign, Mora throws the door open and drags Poe in. This room has a window and Mora starts working at the latch. Poe glances out the hall and ducks back in just when he sees a flash of white armor appear at the top of the stairs.

“Hurry,” he pleads.

“I can’t,” she hisses back, careful to keep her voice low. “It’s stuck.”

“Oh Maker,” Poe groans. He shoves her aside and pushes on the window with all his weight. For a long, painful moment he’s sure it’s not going to budge. Then, with an unfortunately loud crack it bursts free and swings open. The stormtroopers start yelling, Poe can make out, “End of the hall,” when he grabs Mora by the shoulder and begins shoving her out the window.

She fights him at first, hesitant to drop to the rocky surface below, but when the stormtroopers get closer she gives in. “Roll,” Poe says at the last moment, so she does. It’s not graceful, but Poe is just glad she didn’t twist her ankle. 

He wiggles the lower half of his body out the window and he suddenly realizes his shoulders are far broader than Mora’s. Kriff, is he going to fit? He does his best to pull his arms as close to him as he can, but even still there’s a brief moment where he’s sure he’s sure he’d have to dislocate his arm to fit out the window. Just as his head is dropping out of sight the stormtroopers burst into the room and a blaster bullet whizzes over his head.

He lands far more gracefully than Mora did, he’s had an unfortunate amount of practice with this kind of thing. “Run,” he shouts, grabbing her by the hand again and practically dragging her along. They’re both still barefoot and Poe is in nothing but his boxers, it’s far from ideal. Lusit is made up of hexagonal rocks with just the smallest of cracks between them. The cracks allow salt water to seep up occasionally, like some huge heart is pumping underneath their feet. This makes all the uneven footing slick, which only adds to the danger factor. Poe has never wanted to be wearing his boots this bad before.

Blasters are firing behind them and Poe is thankful beyond belief that stormtroopers have such bad aim. Nevertheless, blasts lick at their heels. “That one,” he shouts to Mora, pointing out a civilian ship he brought for the mission. He was upset when Leia told him he couldn’t bring his X-Wing, she worried it would bring too much attention. But now he’s thankful because he wouldn’t be able to fit Mora in his X-Wing.

Poe drops Mora’s hand so that he can run to the ship and punch in the code to open the door. When he looks up again Mora has stopped, standing five feet away and just staring at the open door of the cockpit.

“Mora,” Poe pleads, “just get in.”

“Lusit is my home,” she says. Her voice is soft but Poe can hear the anger in it nonetheless. They’re out of range now so the shooting has stopped but Poe knows it’s only a few more seconds before the troopers make it out the front door of the inn and start firing again.

“Get in the damn ship, Mora. If you stay here you die.” As if on cue the front door of the inn bursts open and the stormtroopers are running at them and firing. 

Poe, who always prides himself on his chivalry, does not wait for Mora to make up her mind. He hoists her small frame over his shoulder and carries her the last few feet to the ship. He’s thankful that she doesn’t fight it, she just lets him shove her in the passenger seat. He’s been on the other end of Mora’s rage and it’s not fun. She’s not big or particularly strong but kriff, is she scrappy.

Poe shuts the door behind her and rushes to the other side, climbing in and flipping the ignition on. This ship isn’t made to take bullets like his X-Wing is and the stormtroopers are still firing on them. Mora is griping the armrests of her chair so hard that her knuckles are ghostly white. Poe feels like it’s taking entirely too long for the control system to boot up. Just when he thinks someone must have sabotaged his ship it chimes, letting them know it’s ready for take off. Poe wastes no time in pulling up, rocketing towards the stars.

“Kriff,” Mora moans and Poe looks over in time to catch her covering her eyes with the hand that isn’t preoccupied clenching the armrest. They’re in the leaving Lusit’s atmosphere now. He reaches over and tentatively touches Mora’s arm. She shakes it off without even looking at him.

He’s in trouble.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was doing some plotting and decided to change the entire direction I want this story to go in. It renewed my excitement for writing it so that's cool! Still deciding if I want it to end with a happily ever after or not.

**Present**

Once they’re safely on autopilot Poe starts digging through the small storage compartment for a spare outfit. He’s thankful that he left some clothes on the ship, it would be mortifying to return to base in his boxers. He pulls a spare shirt over his head and is shimmying into a pair of too-tight pants when Mora speaks up. “What the hell did you get me involved in, Dameron?”

Poe sighs loudly as he does the buttons up on his shirt. “It was supposed to be an easy mission, but the First Order must have gotten to our informant.”

“And what does this mean for me? When do I get to go home?”

Poe shrugs. “It’ll be awhile. The First Order is going to be keeping an eye out for you after seeing us together. Maybe a month or more. We’ll keep you safe on base until then.”

“A  _ month _ ?”

“Or more,” Poe reminds her.

“You’re insufferable,” Mora says, twisting her body away from him to stare out the window.

Poe laughs coldly, “So are you, sweetheart.

“I knew it was a good thing when you left.” 

This is like a hard kick to the gut, Poe feels all the air rush out of him with a quiet huff. He can’t find words at first, isn’t even sure he wants to respond to that. Then, his voice barely more than a whisper, “Take that back.”

Mora doesn’t respond, just continues to stare out the window.

“You always act like this,” Poe begins, unable to control himself. His blood is boiling hot, Mora knows just how to get under his skin. “I never know what to expect from you. One minute you’re trying to coerce me into bed with you and next you’re telling me you hate me.”

“I didn’t  _ coerce _ you and I never said I hated you,” she scoffs. “This is  _ so like you _ , to twist my words around so you can win an argument. It’s been six kriffing years and you still haven’t grown up a bit.”

“Well what am I supposed to think when you say some banthashit like that?”

“I don’t know, what was I supposed to think when you ran away?” she responds coolly.

For the second time today Poe has the wind knocked out of him. “Joining the Navy wasn’t running away, Mora. Smuggling spice was running away.””

“And what were you running from, Poe?” Mora’s voice is laced with venom, obviously not impressed by this response.

“I wasn’t ready to save the world,” he says softly. Mora laughs so harshly that he flinches.

“You have  _ such  _ a big head, it’s a wonder you don’t just float away.”

**Past**

Mora is sitting on her bed smoking a joint, blowing the smoke out the window. She flicks the ash onto the filthy floor. Poe, who is perched precariously on the edge of her bed, just watches her. Mora holds the joint out and he shakes his head.

“Do you ever think we’re meant to do something bigger than this?” He asks her. Mora doesn’t answer. She takes a long drag from her joint, exhales the smoke in his direction, and stubs it out. He didn’t really mean to say it out loud, but it’s been on his mind for awhile now. He’s starting to question what he’s meant to be doing with his life. Because surely it isn’t  _ this. _ This shameful, illegal job that he can’t even tell his father about because he knows how much it would upset him. This terrible job that would also disappoint his late mother so much. She wanted him to join the navy when he turned of age, and why hadn’t he? Why had he instead run off to Kijimi in the middle of the night? Why hadn’t he been home to see his father in years? Poe knows why, and the answer makes him feel ashamed. Poe Dameron, son of the rebel heroes Shara Bey and Kes Dameron was  _ scared _ .

“It’s not the same for me,” Mora finally says. “Your family is  _ different. _ ” She doesn’t bother to hide the envy in her voice. Then, without a hint of condescension, “What do you think you should be doing Poe?”

“I don’t know,” he shrugs, but he  _ does _ know. He just hates saying it outloud, he knows it sounds so  _ smug. _ He doesn’t meet her eyes when he says, “Sometimes I think I’m meant to be saving the world… or something.”

Mora says nothing for what feels like minutes- in reality it’s only seconds. Then she opens her mouth and a loud, genuine laugh erupts from her. He feels himself blush,  _ that was a silly thing to say out loud. _

“You have such a big head Poe, it’s a wonder you don’t float away.” But she leans in and kisses him nonetheless. He kisses back without hesitation, thinking to himself that if he wasn’t careful he could become addicted to her lips.

**Present**

Poe and Mora spend the rest of the ride to D’Qar in complete silence. It’s not a comfortable silence but Poe is just thankful they’re done arguing- for now.

“What planet is this?” Mora asks as they begin their descent.

“That’s classified,” Poe responds, even though he knows its stupid. She’ll find out soon enough, there’s no way the entire base can keep that a secret. But Poe can’t help it, he  _ wants _ to irritate her.

“Commander Dameron,” a voice comes over the comms. “You’re back early.”

He allows himself to sigh loudly before he flicks his comms on to reply to the command center. “Tell Leia to meet me in the debriefing room, there was an incident,” he replies. He silently thanks mission control for not asking him to elaborate. He’s still trying to work out all the details in his head.

He feels immense waves of relief and dread simultaneously when he lands in the hangar. On one hand he can finally put a litte bit of space between himself and Mora. They’ve been trapped in this tiny ship for hours and the recycled air  _ smells like her _ . On the other hand he has to report to Leia and let her know the mission was a failure, and he  _ hates _ doing that. It always makes him feel so terrible.

When he exits the cockpit he notices that the hangar is blessedly empty. He doesn’t need anyone asking questions about the mission,  _ or MoraI, _ not before he sees Leia. “Am I supposed to follow you?” Mora asks when he begins his walk of shame.

“Yes,” he tells her without sparing a glance back. At this point he isn’t even sure if he’s mad or just hurt. They head to the debriefing room in silence once more. When they get to the door he stops her, “Wait out here. If anyone questions you tell them you’re with Commander Dameron.”

“You just like the idea of me calling you by your title,” She replies and there’s no malice to it, only teasing. Poe’s expression softens some, maybe this is her extending the olive branch. Poe offers her a small, experimental smile. Her expression remains humorless, but there’s definitely less tension between them for a moment. 

Poe ducks into the debriefing room feeling pretty okay. He goes to sit across from Leia. She’s drinking a mug of something and has a plate of rations in front of her. She clearly just came from lunch. “Caff?” she offers, pointing out a spare mug she presumably brought for him. “You seem tense.”

Poe smiles thankfully at her and takes it. He stalls by taking a couple sips, but he also just genuinely needs the caff after the morning he just had. Failure is hard for Poe, it makes him think about his mother. He wonders how she feels when he fails missions? He tries to remember her comforting him when he was just a boy, but those memories are so foggy now. Poe’s tongue feels big for his mouth when he finally says, “The First Order found out about it, they showed up. I don’t know what happened to our informant.” He takes a long sip of caff. “And I had to bring someone back with me.” This is unusual for Poe to leave out so many details, usually he loves to boast about his adventures.

Leia quirks an eyebrow at him but says nothing, just sips her caff and waits for him to continue. 

“It’s an old friend of mine, she helped me sneak out the back of the inn. The stormtroopers saw her with me and obviously I couldn’t leave her. She’s willing to work.” Poe doesn’t know if that part is true, but it’s not like Mora is in a position to argue.  _ When has that ever stopped her before? _

Leia nods understandingly, a hint of a smile on her face. It’s a knowing smile that makes Poe a little uncomfortable.  _ How could she know? He’s just being paranoid, right? _ “Bring your friend in here, Poe.” 

Poe pushes his chair out, hyperware of the scratching noise it makes on the stone floor of the base. He half expects Mora to be gone when he opens the door- that would be a very Mora thing to do, but to her credit she’s standing in the same exact spot he left her.

“The General would like to meet you,” he tells her, his mouth is very dry.

He notices the way her fists are clenched at her side, they’re so tight that her knuckles are pale. He reaches a hand out and touches her elbow gently. Her fists tighten even more at the gesture but she doesn’t shake him off. They stare each other in the eyes for just a moment and Poe has no idea what she’s thinking, he’s never been able to read her very well. Then she walks into the debriefing room and he lets his hand fall from her elbow.

Leia stands as they come in, offering a hand out to Mora. “General Leia Organa,” she says as she shakes Mora’s hand.

“Mora,” she responds, and Poe doesn’t fail to notice she’s dropped her last name all together.  _ That was probably a long time coming. _

“It's a pleasure to meet you, Mora. Take a seat.” Leia motions to Poe’s seat, leaving him to stand while they talk. “I’m sorry you had to get mixed up in all this business, but just know that any friend of Poe’s is a friend of mine.”

Mora smiles politely. Poe takes a moment to silently appreciate how easy going Mora is being. It rarely goes like this when he interacts with her, their relationship has always been so volatile.

“I do have to ask that you help out around base though,” Leia continues. “Nothing major, but we always need help with all sorts of things.” Leia explains.

“The medbay,” Poe exclaims suddenly, unable to help himself. He blushes a little at his own enthusiasm and the way they’re both looking at him, Leia’s look is far too knowing for comfort. “Sorry- Mora has a background in the medical field.” Mora’s caramel skin flushes and she shoots him a look that says  _ shut up. _

“Is that so? We always need nurses.”

The look Mora is now giving Poe says  _ I’m going to kill you for this _ . But she turns to smile at Leia nonetheless. “It’s not much of a background, General. But I would be more than willing to give your doctors a hand.”

Poe rolls his eyes internally at Mora, she’s so humble. She started working under a doctor at a very young age and quickly became his head nurse. She was well on her way to becoming a doctor herself before she got addicted to spice.

“Wonderful,” Leia tells her. “I’ll talk to our head doctor right away. Let me see if I can find you an open room.” She pulls up a datapad and begins to tap through it, which gives Mora time to send Poe another exasperated look. He just smiles innocently at her. She tries to remain stony but her resolve breaks and the corners of her mouth twitch up into a shy smile.

“Room D14,” Leia says suddenly, breaking up whatever  _ moment _ Poe and Mora were having. “You’d be rooming with a technician, Alyshha of the green squadron. Poe, can you take her there?”

Poe nods, it’s on the fourth sublevel and well out of the way of his own room that sits on the surface. His annoyance with Mora has dissipated since this morning though and he’d love nothing more than to walk her to her room.

“I’ll have clothes and uniforms sent down to your room, as well as someone to speak to you about your duties.” Leia smiles warmly at Mora. “I’m sorry again that you had to get mixed up in all this.”

Mora shrugs, “It happens, just glad Poe is okay.”

Poe is pretty sure his heart doubles in size when she says that. Leia’s smile is positively impish now and Poe has to shoot  _ her  _ a warning look. He’s usually thankful for his close relationship with Leia, but now he can already see her beginning to play matchmaker. Leia is  _ trouble _ .


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i didn't proofread this at all, yeet! Anyways, I hope you enjoy this chapter. It has a ton of Mora's backstory in it, hope I didn't drop too much on you at once.

**Present**

Poe is sent another mission first thing the next day. He’s not happy about it but the war doesn’t stop for a single pilot’s personal dilemmas. Anyways, he ought to make up for his last mission. He wants to wish Mora well before he leaves, he could be gone for awhile, but when he knocks on her door she never answers. He stands out there foolishly for far longer than he probably should, just waiting for her to open the door. 

At some point a young woman walks up to the door and stops, eyeing Poe curiously. He recognizes her as Alyshha, a technician who just joined in the last few months. She’s just barely of age and it shows in her face. Her eyes are so big and youthful and she’s got all that timidness of a kid surrounded by authority. “Commander Dameron,” she greets shly. “Can I help you with something?” She won’t look him in the eye and her cheeks are flushed pink- a pretty combo with her strawberry blonde hair. He gets that reaction a lot from recruits of her age even without trying.

“Uh, no thanks,” he says awkwardly, rubbing a hand over his jaw. He forgot to shave, he’ll have a full beard by the time he gets back. “I was just visiting with Mora.” He turns to leave then, wishing her a good night as he goes.

He’s off to the hangar then. He doesn’t get Mora, sometimes she seems like she’s trying to make peace and then next thing he knows she’s yanking the rug out from under him. Leaving the way he did was shitty and he gets that. He feels terrible about it but he needed to make a change for the better and he couldn’t do that with Mora. He never would have been able to stop using spice if he didn’t get away.

“Poe,” Oddy Muva, his technician, says when he gets to his X-Wing. Oddy is in the middle of unhooking the fuel pump from Poe’s beloved ship.. There’s a little orange and white BB unit with him, chirping excitedly. “This is BB-8,” Oddy explains, “he was recovered from a downed freighter awhile back, the mechanics finally got to fixing him.”

Poe nods, not really understanding why Oddy is telling him this. He’s supposed to be leaving now, Oddy of all people should know that.

“I asked Leia where she wanted him sent and she mentioned you.”

_ Oh! _ Poe’s face lights up, “BB-8 huh?” He leans down and pats the droid on the head affectionately. Poe loves droids, when he was a kid his father had an ancient C1 unit that helped out on the farm. Then, in the Navy he had the opportunity to work with an R3 unit. He had been particularly fond of that droid but when he left the Navy he had to leave her behind. “Well BB, let’s see how you do out there, huh?”

BB-8 chirps happily in agreement and rolls over to the droid port of Poe’s X-Wing. Poe watches happily as the mechanical arms come down to grab the little droid. “Are we all set for takeoff, Oddy?”

“Yes sir, just finished all the final checks,” he claps Poe on the shoulder. “Good luck out there.”

“I don’t need luck,” Poe tells him with a wink, “Plus I’ve got BB-8 to watch my back now.” Then he gets in his ship and is gone for a week. It’s just a simple recon mission, nothing particularly difficult or exhilarating. It’s a long way from base and most of the time Poe finds himself lost in his own thoughts about Mora. He’s starting to wonder if his short lived drug addiction had actually been to spice; or had he actually been addicted to Mora?

When Poe makes it back to D'Qar, Oddy Muva is there to greet him again. He asks how the mission went, more importantly how did the droid do? At the mention of the little BB unit Poe turns to look at it being unloaded from his X-Wing. “I love him already,” Poe tells Oddy. The second BB-8 hits the ground he comes rolling over to Poe and Oddy, beeping excitedly about the mission.

“Sounds like you guys are a good team,” Oddy says, the tendrils on his face wiggle with the effort of his huge smile.

Poe agrees, then makes his way to debriefing. He hopes it goes fast, he’s starving. There’s a packet of burra fish in gravy calling his name from the mess hall. Luckily debriefing is faster than ever tonight. Poe got back pretty late so most of the commanders are all just hoping to cut it quick and get back to their evening plans, whether it be retiring to their rooms or going to the on base cantina. 

Poe heads to the mess hall right away after debriefing. He heats up his favorite meal packet in the microwave, the aforementioned burra fish. He’s planning on going to his room to enjoy his meal, he’s ready for some time off. Then he thinks about Mora. It makes his chest pang with longing. So he turns on his heel and heads back the other way, down to Mora’s quarters on sublevel D. 

He knocks on her door, unable to help but bounce on his heels. He’s equal parts excited and nervous to see her, he’s hoping to get a warm reception after his time away. Surely she missed him? He’s the only person she knows here. Mora opens quickly and with a shockingly bright smile. “Hi,” she greets breathlessly. Her face is flushed and her hair askew.

“Hey,” Poe can tell he looks shocked, but he can’t help it. This isn’t the Mora that was here a week ago. He’s always loved this version of Mora the most, though she rarely comes out. He can see into her room behind her. All the lights are on and there’s music playing softly. 

As if she doesn’t want him looking in there Mora steps out the door and pulls it shut behind her. “Good to see you in one piece,” she tells him.

Poe’s palms are sweaty and his mouth feels very, very dry. Girls  _ never _ have this effect on him. “Am I interrupting something?” he asks, looking over her shoulder at the closed door.

“No,” she assures him. “We’re just up late. I’m off duty tomorrow.”

Poe nods, his stomach untwisting significantly. “How’s it going for you, the med bay?”

“I really like it,” Mora says while nodding. Poe takes this as a considerable win. Then she surprises him again by elaborating. “They made me a nurse, which comes with a lot more responsibility here then it did on Coruscant.” Poe watches her cringe when she mentions the bustling planet, she has a lot of bad memories associated with that place.

“And how’s your roommate?”

“I like her,” now Mora is smiling. Poe smiles too, Mora doesn’t tend to take well to strangers. What are the chances she not only likes working in the medbay but she likes her roommate as well? “She’s cool, she’s actually from the Coruscant underworld as well. Small galaxy, huh?”

“Small galaxy,” Poe agrees. “I’m glad you’re fitting in, Mora. If you need anything just come find me, room A26.”

“You’re awfully good at playing the hero,” she tells him, but without her usual malice. She reaches out and grabs his hand in hers, giving it a firm squeeze. “Goodnight, Poe.” Then she’s slipping back into her room. When the door clicks shut Poe lets out a shaky breath. He doesn’t understand how she can still be so irresistible to him after all this time. No girl has ever captured Poe’s attention like this. Leia and his squad always tease him for being “married to the cause”. He stands outside her door for far longer than normal, just lost in his own thoughts. Finally he turns to leave, his body taking him to his quarters on autopilot.

He’s just getting out of the refresher and putting on his pajamas when someone knocks on the door to his quarter. He frowns involuntarily, at first he thinks maybe he imagined it. Who would be knocking on his door at these ungodly hours? He walks over and slips his shirt over his head before he opens the door, his browline tight with confusion. When he sees who it is his face instantly softens.

**Past**

“I’ve been thinking about my mom lately,” Mora says, she never looks at Poe. Her eyes are trained out the grimy window next to her bed. She lives in the Coruscant underworld with her dad in a tiny 2 bedroom home. It’s always messy and filled with the fumes of spice, her dad is an even bigger addict than her. As a matter of fact he’s the only reason Mora has gotten into the illicit drug. Mora brings her joint up to her mouth and sucks in a lungful of smoke. She lets it go and passes the joint over to Poe. “I wonder if she has another family.”

Poe doesn’t know what to say so he just listens. Mora rarely opens up about her feelings, especially about her mom. Her mom left shortly after she was born. She didn’t leave any explanation of why or where she was going and never bothered to reach out to Mora or her father. Poe thinks in some ways it’s a blessing that Mora can’t remember her mom at all, it means there’s less to miss.

“I bet her new kids aren’t addicted to spice,” Mora says bitterly. Then she takes the joint back from Poe and takes another hit. She coughs the smoke out violently and then offers it back to Poe.

“I’m good,” he tells her. He’s never had the tolerance that Mora does because he’s not interested in having a better high each time he smokes. She shrugs as if to say “more for me” and takes another hit. Poe recognizes how beautiful she looks like this; her eyes full of emotion and smoke drifting in the air around her, making her look hazy. “Your mom sucks,” he tells her, his words coming out slow from the spice.

Mora looks at him with the faintest of smiles. “At least I have my dad. I just wish he hadn’t lost the diner.” 

Sometimes Poe thinks she’d be better off without her dad, but he doesn’t tell her that. She loves her dad, even if he is a colossal loser. Poe hates him for what he did to her, though. He hates him for ever getting such a beautiful, strong willed girl hooked on drugs. She met her match with spice.

Before Mora got addicted to spice there had been real hope of her becoming a doctor. Then her father had started using spice and ended up selling his whole life for the drug. He had to sell the ownership of his diner and he started dealing spice. It wasn’t look after that when he convinced Mora to give the addictive drug a try. She lost her job at the medical center not long after.

**Present**

Mora is standing on the other side of the door with sad eyes. She’s not crying yet, but she looks close to it. Poe stands there in shock for a moment before her lip starts to tremble. He ushers her in quickly and shuts the door behind her. When he turns around she’s already perched on the edge of his bed, though she looks ready to take off at any moment. Poe goes to sit by her and he rests a hand comfortingly on hers, rubbing soft circles into her skin with his thumb.

She stares down at their hands for a long time before she begins to speak. “My dad died,” she tells Poe, her voice hushed like someone might overhear them.

Poe had expected as much as that, when he had left her father had been up to his neck in spice. He had lost a lot of weight and Poe had figured it wouldn’t be long for him, he hardly ate and hardly slept. The only thing keeping him going was the drugs. “I’m sorry,” he tells Mora, his voice softer than he’s ever heard it before.

She brings her free hand up to rub at her eyes furiously. “I knew it was coming, but I don’t think you can ever be ready for something like that.”

Poe thinks of his mom. Poe had been too young to really understand. It wasn’t until hours later and his mother wasn’t there to tuck him in that he understood. “You don’t deserve the cards the world has dealt you, Mora.” She’s still not looking at him, just staring at their hands. She brings her hand up to rub her eyes again. “It’s okay to cry,” Poe tells her.

And cry she does. The tears start to flow freely, she goes to hide her face in her hands but Poe grabs her arms and pulls her tight to his chest. He wraps his arms around her and brings one up to rest on the back of her head, helping guide her face into the collar of his sleep shirt. She’s stiff at first, like she doesn’t want to enjoy his touch. Her cries even stop for a moment, but then she grabs him tight and starts to cry even harder than before.

Mora cries for a long time. Poe holds her the whole time, a growing wet spot on the neck of his t-shirt. He doesn’t say much, just rubs the back of her head until her cries start to slow. He’s acutely aware of how wonderful it feels to have her in his arms like this. Though he wishes it wasn’t under such depressing circumstances.

Once she finally seems like she’s all cried out Mora sits back from Poe some. He keeps an arm wrapped around her though, rubbing his hand up and down her arm. He’s not sure if the gesture is more for her or himself. “I think the worst part was you’d only been gone for a month.”

Poe’s hand stills for a moment, the gears in his head grinding away to find a good thing to say. Finally he settles on, “I’m so sorry, Mora.”

She shrugs, “Not worth opening that can of worms tonight. You saw him before you left, he was a skeleton by that point. So imagine how much damage another month did. He got so high he blacked out and then never woke up.” Mora noticeably shudders, it makes Poe start rubbing her arm again.

“That must have been so hard to lose him, I’m glad you made it through that.” He means that in so many ways. Financially, emotionally, and as sober as she is. Had she gotten as addicted to spice as her father had she probably wouldn’t be sitting here next to Poe. She’s a week into a sober life on base and she’s not in the midst of a withdrawal meltdown.

“It sucked,” she says. It could almost pass for nonchalant if it wasn’t for the large sigh that follows it. “I got really bad for a while, I was spending so much on spice that I could hardly afford to keep living in Coruscant. I had a client who told me he could get me work on Tatooine, that’s how I got into dancing.” She grimaces when she says it.

Poe doesn’t push for more information on that, he knows if she wants to share she will. He’s never been to the Hutt Palace on Tatooine but he’s heard terrible stories. The palace sat empty for years after the galactic civil war but just recently a new gangster has made Tatooine his home. He’s sad to be just as despicable as the last Hutt to occupy the palace.

One of Mora’s braids has fallen loose from the bun on top of her head and Poe reaches out to tuck it behind her ear. She meets his eyes, her own are full of pain. “I’m so glad you’ve made it this far,” Poe says softly.

Mora’s eyes become very wet and she pulls him into another hug. “I don’t want to be alone tonight,” she whispers. Poe’s heart rate picks up substantially. He considers his next words carefully. It’s not necessarily against the rules of the resistance for her to spend the night in his room. But does it go against Poe’s rules of chivalry to let her stay? She’s the one who asked but he also knows she never would have asked if she wasn’t so sad.

“Then stay,” Poe says, the words sounding foreign as they come out of his mouth. He’s not sure he gave himself permission to say that. But there’s no taking it back now and Mora wordlessly lays back on the bed. Poe does too. He desperately wants to pull her to his chest but he knows better than to push his luck, so instead he just stares at the ceiling and lets sleep slowly take over.

When he wakes up in the morning she’s already gone.


End file.
